If I had three wishes...

Tomorrow is the last day of school, and I have to say...it's WEIRD that I'm not more excited.  There's something about actually being at school--either as a teacher or a student--that REALLY ups the excitement level on the last day of school.

As a part of the end-of-the-year festivities, we FINALLY got the books that the boys wrote.  TANGENT:  the books were written and paid for back in DECEMBER.  However, the ruddy checks didn't clear until two weeks ago.  Am I the only one for whom that spells disaster?  Not to mention irritating surprises when I check my account balance.  Some day I'll grow up and actually USE the accounting software that's sitting right there on my desktop...

Ahem.  End tangent.

Ethan's book is a solo effort that can be described as Harry Potter meets Percy Jackson meets Interdimensional Warping of Reality.  It truly belongs on the New York Times Bestseller list.

Elijah's, on the other hand, belongs in an anthropology textbook.  Maybe sociology.  Definitely psychology.  His is a class effort with each student contributing a page about what they would wish for if they had three wishes.

It's VERY interesting reading.  Also, hysterical.  Here are some excerpts:


"My first wish is for peace so no one would be at war.  My second wish is for $10,000 to buy games.  My third is that I can fly because I could see almost everything."  --Elijah

Elijah, buddy, even if you had $10,000 worth of games--which I'm assuming would be of the video genre--that doesn't mean you get extra time in front of the glowy box.  Sorry.  Love, your evil stepmother.

"My first wish is to [be] invisible.  My second wish is to be able to read minds.  My third wish is to be able to fly."  --B.


This kid has definitely read about the genie in a bottle's little tricks and isn't going to risk any misinterpretation of his wish to be a super hero.  Way to think analytically, B!  You are the future of America!

There were some common threads--the girls generally wanted to be a butterfly, live in a castle, and have lots of dresses/be a princess.  The boys wanted Goosebumps books, superpowers, and a PSP 3.  There were, however, a few standouts:

The kid I call Master Chief  because he beat me at a math game (and that was the prize--me calling him Master Chief for the rest of time) comes off as a punk.  However, he wants to be a pilot and an excellent reader who is very smart.  I hope manages to beat the odds, because they are stacked against him, and not on the intelligence front.

The little kid in the class who is quiet and unobtrusive has perfected the art of writing his name as if it were a graffiti tag.  I hope that's not a sign.

The little kid who is an immigrant and a member of probably the most distrusted ethnic group in America right now just wants a friend and to fit in.  I'm sorry, I don't care where you're from or what your religion is.  Little kids deserve to be little kids, and that breaks my heart.

OK, I'm about to start ranting and need to wrap this up.  I want to pass on one last gem:

"My first wish is to be a giant burrito.  My second wish is that I could control the plane.  My third wish is that I could control the sun."  --T.

T, you best stay away from the Alfreds.  We love a good, giant burrito.

Incidentally, if I had three wishes, they would be:

1.  A remote that works on children.  It only needs two functions:  volume control and sleep.
2.  Samantha Stevens' ability to snap her fingers and teleport ANYWHERE.  I'd go to Lake Powell and Disneyland A LOT more.  Not to mention see my family more.
3.  A full-service maid.

Peace.